Wednesday, June 28

nail-fucking-polish

only the most brilliant of minds could waltz right into a room, with its door and window closed and air-conditioning freshly switched on, and proceed to fume it up by painting her nails at eleven-oh-five at night. when she's just got home.

only the most brilliant of minds.

i re-opened the window and door, and switched on the fan at full tilt to de-fume it. she waltzed back in and undid all that.

only the most fucking brilliant of minds.

Crow. Bar.

Tuesday, June 27

"please consider this my two weeks' notice."

it's easier said than meant.

we'll see how long the rest of it lasts.

Monday, June 26

Film Review: Superman Returns

and so, i'm back from the gala premiere of Superman Returns.

don't watch it. it's predictable, and boring. it's not even worth the sum of time spent there, free popcorn/coke combo, and the goodie bags. i cannot believe Bryan Singer left the X-Men trilogy to that hack director so that he could squeeze out this turd of a film. oh, and this Superman might not be gay, but he sure is one hell of an attention-seeking media whore.

if you insist, then run out and buy a Superman comic and some (actually, a lot of) Samsung electronics. then juxtapose Superman with the Samsungs in your living room, or whatever. you'll get the same effect.
"I think Superman Returns has put my brain on Permanently Bored."
if i must give stars, this one's a half-star.

Sunday, June 18

PowerBook

"Plus, thanks to the status symbol factor, the PowerBook is the only notebook that works when turned off."

Teddy, Balaclava, Absolut and Threadless

I don't think it's fair that I discovered Teddy Geiger first, and I bought his album before the bloody newspaper review came out, and I didn't get a bloody invite to his bloody gig at bloody Balaclava.

I mean, of all places. BALACLAVA? Loser yuppies that don't have anywhere to go go there. It’s such a dickhead place to go (and by that, I mean that I fully expect to have to go there in the future, when some more of my friends grow up, get jobs in cubicle farms at Temasek Avenue, and then become sad yuppies with nowhere else to go, so they booze up at some lame open-air yuppie bar.)

Wait. Where was I? Yes. Teddy Geiger had a gig at Balaclava, and because I was an early adopter and liked his music (and not photos of him or his album reviews in Life! or Lime or Seventeen Singapore) and bought his album before it exploded all over pre-pubescent Singapore, I don't get to go to listen to him live.

How fair is that? Okay I’m rambling now. I shouldn't have gone to that party last night. I boozed up far too much and drank what… what was it, one shot of Patrick’s layered stuff, a screwdriver with less vodka than it’d like, and a full glass of vodka on the rocks? Must have been that, at least. And it was Absolut, which meant it smelt like paint stripper, even if it did taste fine. Wasted time, wasted money.

Though the nice cab driver who took me home rounded down my cab fare to eight dollars, which was very nice. But I only discovered that between getting out of the cab and staring uncomprehendingly at the two-dollar note in my hand, being too distracted to notice anything while it's actually happening. So I didn't even get to thank him for saving my morning from the depths of the night before.

How sad am I? I more or less chugged paint stripper, at a sad gathering of sad people, most of whom I cannot really consider my friends, since I don’t see them unless it’s at some sad booze-up.

And isn’t getting slightly toasted like I did (I thought I’d gone overboard—wasn’t sure if I was drunk-drunk but I felt silly and like I was acting silly, but I was repeatedly reassured that I wasn’t drunk, just a bit tipsy, but I’d had a lot to drink) supposed to make you temporarily feel better? I felt sadder, more upset with things outside my control.

What the fuck am I to going to do with all my Medium-sized t-shirts?

Wednesday, June 14

oh, great.

Threadless is having another sale.

this time i shall order large-sized shirts.

Monday, June 12

the facts of life

i'm sitting at the Dell, typing this out, because while sitting in the dark, crouched over my PowerBook sat on a folding table has never agreed with me, i'm only now starting not to accept it as a subsitute for a proper computing environment.

anyway, much as i think that the PowerBook G4 keyboard (which one day i must accept is also the MacBook Pro's keyboard) is one of the best in the world, sometimes you need a full-sized keyboard. i can't decide if the loud clacking of the Dell Quietkey Keyboard i'm using now is a boon or a bane, though. on one hand, it's a physical embodiment of the cathartic effect, so in a sense, it helps. on the other, it's just damned fricking loud. i wonder how the Apple Keyboard sounds like when you're banging an essay out on it.

what am i dong up at half-past three in the morning? i have a feeling that i might soon succumb completely to what ails me. the sixteen-hour periods of sleep and four-hour-long bouts of insomnia (hello, three-thirty AM) point to signs.

have i been thinking too much? maybe. at home isn't a place where you should have to hide. it seems, though, that it's where i do a fair bit of my hiding. things have been repressed, feelings pushed away, pretence in place of pobity. it's going to be three years since soon, and while it's started two years ago, it only got more difficult as time passed on. especially one year after.

but then again, if i think about it, it's been an entire lifetime of stashing things away. i am, after all, a pack rat, and nothing gets chucked away no matter how much it needs to be disposed of. that's why they tell you to compartmentalize--no one can force you to let go. i can hold grudges for ever. i can forgive in an instant, and in the short term dismiss it from consciousness, but i never forget forever.

i need something to happen. something that will change me, affect me, capture me, enthrall me, doing something to me. but maybe i should be careful of what i wish for.

i'm getting more and more tired. i can't keep my energy up. the old adage of sleeping early, waking early and getting a full eight hours' sleep has never worked for me, and forcing myself into that fixed pattern only makes it worse. the best i can do is distract myself with whatever happenes to catch my fancy at the moment, and see what happens.

may you live in interesting times.

Je ne suis pas fière de ça
Vie qui veut me tuer
C'est magnifique être sympathique
Mais je ne le connais jamais

Sunday, June 11

there's a lot behind a little move

there are a lot of Nokia sliding form-factor phones being resold of late. this includes, but is not limited to, the 6111, 6280 and N80.

i wonder why?

Saturday, June 10

Multimedia message


Multimedia message
Originally uploaded by aklw.

Can you say, "Coarse and vuglar?" I haven't been to another mid-class restaurant less pleasant to sit in than this one.

Friday, June 9

contact

my eyes started to get extremely uncomfortable as i crossed the four lanes of Geylang Road just now. but these are the Bausch & Lomb contact lenses, so it was probably a random speck of dust.

things aren't always what they appear to be.

Thursday, June 8

Wednesday, June 7

Multimedia message


Multimedia message
Originally uploaded by aklw.

waiting for a bus to town from home is like playing Bingo, except that you apparently have to get all the other numbers twice over before you can win with the number you want.

Monday, June 5

Multimedia message


Multimedia message
Originally uploaded by aklw.

The Devil Wears Versace.

the Dell Dimension

i had to revive the Dell again today, because i wanted to play Need For Speed: Porsche Unleashed.

i hate the fucking thing. i wouldn't care if it never boots again, if it weren't my gaming staple. if only i could get one of those half-price Xbox 360s on sale at the airport this Saturday...

Sunday, June 4

one week's notice

my sixth cousin is getting married to a man named Elvis.

the wedding should be fun.

Friday, June 2

je veux seulement oublier...

i don't write with the regularity that i used to. i wrote more often, and i wrote much more. now i tend to send a photo from my mobile phone and publish it here, and oftentimes the accompanying text that i thumb into the message doesn't make it with the photo, for some reason replaced with "Brought to you by StarHub."

but bad things happen all the time. there is a constant flow of shit hitting the fan, in my life, and i don't expect to stem the flow or the flow to be stemmed.

good things have happened, and that should be enough. but when some things happen and you're not sure what they mean, it just makes you feel much, much worse. you constantly think, wonder, analyze and over-analyze, and you become paranoid-does it means something more? was it just what it was? was it a hint? was it just teasing?

good things have happened. that should be enough.